Japanese BabesDating&and&Sex&in&China
on 05/25/ pm by Robert Vance
“Two American men were deported for sleeping with too many
girls,” a foreign friend reported to me sometime ago. “They gave a
number of girls hope about marriage and traveling to America and
the girls willingly gave themselves to the guys.” My friend was a
teacher in a small town in Central China were news always traveled
fast. She explained that when the girls realized that they had been
‘used’, they complained to the local authorities who promptly
arrested the men and sent them out of the country.
While such stories&are relatively rare in
China, there is little doubt that Chinese women are regularly taken
advantage of by a handful of the thousands of foreigners who are
living and working in China. Some foreigners arrive in China with
the attitude that this country is a ‘playland’ and that taking
advantage of Chinese women will have no consequences. Still, there
many more foreigners in China who just happen to meet a nice girl
that they are truly interested in. Thus, the million dollar
question presents itself. Is it a good
idea&for&foreigners to date
Chinese women?
The simple answer to this question is ‘yes.’ But wait. don’t
close this page quite yet. There are a few tips that you should
have in your mind before you step into the Chinese dating
&Be honest with your girflfriend about your intentions. If you
are only going to be living in China temporarily, make sure that
she understand this. Do not lead her on by giving her false hope
for the future. Doing this could cause trouble for you later
&PDA (Public Display of Affection) is still highly frowned upon
in many parts of China. Kissing and even holding hands in public
is&considered improper by the older
generation.
&Going to visit your girlfriend’s hometown is often seen as a
serious step towards marriage in China. If you are invited to visit
your girlfriends’ hometown during a holiday, be careful. Accepting
the invitation may send the wrong message to her and her
&In traditional culture, the fewer boyfriends
that&a&girl has before marriage,
the better. Ideally, a girl should marry her first boyfriend.
&Having multiple girlfriends in China is never a good idea. As
I wrote about earlier, acting ‘the playboy’ in China could have
serious consquences on&the status of your visa.
A quiet yet powerful sexual revolution seems to have been
spreading through China since the turn of the millenium. Attitudes
about sex before marriage are gradually changing amongst the
younger generation. I wrote about this change a
few&months ago&in an article
entitled . However,
engaging in sexual activity with a Chinese girl is still
not&a wise decision for the following reasons:
&If your girlfriend’s parents discover that you are involved
sexually with their daughter, there may be ‘hell to pay.’ Chinese
parents are often extremely protective over their ‘adult’ children
and you could find yourself in serious legal and physical danger. I
have heard stories about enraged parents who have taken matters
into their own hands if they feel that their daughter’s honor has
been somehow compromised.
&If the local police happen to notice that a young lady is
spending an inordinate amount of time at your apartment, they may
suspect that she is a hired prostitute. I have heard stories of
foreigners being deported on the basis of that very suspicion.
&Impregnating a Chinese girl is a serious matter in China. Do
not assume that because you are a foreigner that you will be able
to just leave the girl and let her ‘fend for herself.’ Passports of
foreigners who impregnated Chinese girls have been blocked before
so don’t count on leaving the country.
&For most girls in China, having sex is a sign of a serious
relationship that is headed towards marriage. While there are
always exceptions, most Chinese girls do not want to be simply used
as a ‘plaything.’ Thus, engaging in sex should never be taken
Never forget that you are a guest in China. You are an
unofficial representative of your country and every action that you
take will be scrutinized by someone. It is also important to
remember that Chinese girls, like any other girls around the world,
have feelings. In a country where boy-girl relationships are not
taken lightly, being given hope by a foreigner, used for
‘pleasure’, and then abandoned, could destroy a girl’s outlook on
life. You also need to understand the concept of ‘family shame’ in
China. Bringing shame upon a Chinese girl will also bring shame
upon her family. In some areas of China, such shame could result in
the girl being treated as an outcast in her family and
village&or even being subjected to physical
There is nothing inherently wrong with having a girlfriend in
China. Such a relationship can you help you become better
acclimated to the culture and learn more about your city. It can
also be a good way for you to have a positive impact on a Chinese
girl’s life. However, it may be a good idea
to&treat this relationship more as a friendship
unless you are seriously considering marrying the young lady. Just
be careful and think about the consequences of your actions not
only for yourself but also for the Chinese girl and her family.
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